Conditions!

1 Timothy 3:5-13

The Message (MSG)

Leadership in the Church

3 1-7 If anyone wants to provide leadership in the church, good! But there are preconditions: A leader must be well-thought-of, committed to his wife, cool and collected, accessible, and hospitable. He must know what he’s talking about, not be overfond of wine, not pushy but gentle, not thin-skinned, not money-hungry. He must handle his own affairs well, attentive to his own children and having their respect. For if someone is unable to handle his own affairs, how can he take care of God’s church? He must not be a new believer, lest the position go to his head and the Devil trip him up. Outsiders must think well of him, or else the Devil will figure out a way to lure him into his trap.

In my studies, today, I came across this passage. It made me think of my husband. He is a wonderful father and he is an amazing husband. He loves us with all his being, but more importantly he loves our God. He has loved and followed Him since he was young. He knew, then, that God was calling him into leadership. I love reading his old journals because I see the Christian boy turning into a man who goes on to follow that calling and become a pastor that preaches the gospel in a way that inspires others to be leaders.

Which leads me to the continuation of the passage. Not only do our pastors have conditions but so do we......  

8-13 The same goes for those who want to be servants in the church: serious, not deceitful, not too free with the bottle, not in it for what they can get out of it. They must be reverent before the mystery of the faith, not using their position to try to run things. Let them prove themselves first. If they show they can do it, take them on. No exceptions are to be made for women—same qualifications: serious, dependable, not sharp-tongued, not overfond of wine. Servants in the church are to be committed to their spouses, attentive to their own children, and diligent in looking after their own affairs. Those who do this servant work will come to be highly respected, a real credit to this Jesus-faith.

Workers in the church need to watch themselves as well. They shouldn't just expect their pastors to be as perfect as possible but also should watch out for their own behaviors as well. They need to control their tongues, be committed to their spouses, love their children and be above board. Most importantly they need to love their God with all their hearts. 

I love that these verses say the same for both men and women. I grew up in a church that did not think women could be leaders in the church but the scriptures say different. God made us as equals, but that also means we women need to be as devoted to our God, watch our tongues and be devoted to our men and family as well.

I have to admit that my tongue is one of my trouble spots. How about you? I pray about that all the time!

My hope for you is that you have found a church where there is a pastor that follows the conditions God has set for him or her. Where you can worship but also where you can be inspired to be a leader that God wants you to be. Imagine how at peace our world would be if we all had that.

Blessings! 

We women are amazing!

In my last blog I spoke of our roles as Christian wives. I spoke of how this relationship works. I had many women comment on this. I have to tell you I didn't have any negative remarks from any one. Women along side of men is a very good way to live.

I grew up in a denomination who had very little respect for women and their rights and abilities. The only leading roles we were allowed to take were that of a mother or a Children's Sunday School teacher. We were never allowed any voice in the church. There was even a man who played the piano in worship. I never remember any sermon where they spoke of women from the Bible who were in leadership. Don't get me wrong, these men were wonderful Godly men, in their own way, but I wonder what they were afraid of?

The sad thing is I never questioned this as I was growing up and moving into adulthood. But this didn't give me a very high opinion of myself or any woman for that matter. The first time I heard a female preach I was so floored I never even heard the sermon. Turns out I missed a good one. 

As I have moved on in life and have studied the scriptures and watched several women throughout the world, who have done some amazing things, I see that God doesn't have any problem with women. Hey, He created us to be right up there with men. He respects us and our abilities.

Look here at several instances from scriptures where women were not afraid take leadership....

Judges 4:4

The Message (MSG)

^4-5 Deborah was a prophet, the wife of Lappidoth. She was judge over Israel at that time. She held court under Deborah’s Palm between Ramah and Bethel in the hills of Ephraim. The People of Israel went to her in matters of justice.

Acts 18:26

he Message (MSG)

^24-26 A man named Apollos came to Ephesus. He was a Jew, born in Alexandria, Egypt, and a terrific speaker, eloquent and powerful in his preaching of the Scriptures. He was well-educated in the way of the Master and fiery in his enthusiasm. Apollos was accurate in everything he taught about Jesus up to a point, but he only went as far as the baptism of John. He preached with power in the meeting place. When Priscilla and Aquila heard him, they took him aside and told him the rest of the story.

Acts 9:37-41

The Message (MSG)

^36-37 Down the road a way in Joppa there was a disciple named Tabitha, “Gazelle” in our language. She was well-known for doing good and helping out. During the time Peter was in the area she became sick and died. Her friends prepared her body for burial and put her in a cool room.

^38-40 Some of the disciples had heard that Peter was visiting in nearby Lydda and sent two men to ask if he would be so kind as to come over. Peter got right up and went with them. They took him into the room where Tabitha’s body was laid out. Her old friends, most of them widows, were in the room mourning. They showed Peter pieces of clothing the Gazelle had made while she was with them. Peter put the widows all out of the room. He knelt and prayed. Then he spoke directly to the body: “Tabitha, get up.”

^40-41 She opened her eyes. When she saw Peter, she sat up. He took her hand and helped her up. Then he called in the believers and widows, and presented her to them alive.

Luke 2:36-38

The Message (MSG)

^36-38 Anna the prophetess was also there, a daughter of Phanuel from the tribe of Asher. She was by now a very old woman. She had been married seven years and a widow for eighty-four. She never left the Temple area, worshiping night and day with her fasting and prayers. At the very time Simeon was praying, she showed up, broke into an anthem of praise to God, and talked about the child to all who were waiting expectantly for the freeing of Jerusalem.

Philippians 4:3

The Message (MSG)

³ And, oh, yes, Syzygus, since you’re right there to help them work things out, do your best with them. These women worked for the Message hand in hand with Clement and me, and with the other veterans—worked as hard as any of us. Remember, their names are also in the Book of Life.

These are just a few of the women mentioned in the Bible who were respected leaders. But we don't have to only be prophets, pastors and judges, or presidents of companies, to be respected. We can be wives and mothers and be dong exactly what God wants us to be doing too. In this role we have many areas of leadership! 

Proverbs 31:10-31

The Message (MSG

^10-31 A good woman is hard to find,
    and worth far more than diamonds.
Her husband trusts her without reserve,
    and never has reason to regret it.
Never spiteful, she treats him generously
    all her life long.
She shops around for the best yarns and cottons,
    and enjoys knitting and sewing.
She’s like a trading ship that sails to faraway places
    and brings back exotic surprises.
She’s up before dawn, preparing breakfast
    for her family and organizing her day.
She looks over a field and buys it,
    then, with money she’s put aside, plants a garden.
First thing in the morning, she dresses for work,
    rolls up her sleeves, eager to get started.
She senses the worth of her work,
    is in no hurry to call it quits for the day.
She’s skilled in the crafts of home and hearth,
    diligent in homemaking.
She’s quick to assist anyone in need,
    reaches out to help the poor.
She doesn’t worry about her family when it snows;
    their winter clothes are all mended and ready to wear.
She makes her own clothing,
    and dresses in colorful linens and silks.
Her husband is greatly respected
    when he deliberates with the city fathers.
She designs gowns and sells them,
    brings the sweaters she knits to the dress shops.
Her clothes are well-made and elegant,
    and she always faces tomorrow with a smile.
When she speaks she has something worthwhile to say,
    and she always says it kindly.
She keeps an eye on everyone in her household,
    and keeps them all busy and productive.
Her children respect and bless her;
    her husband joins in with words of praise:
“Many women have done wonderful things,
    but you’ve outclassed them all!”
Charm can mislead and beauty soon fades.
    The woman to be admired and praised
    is the woman who lives in the Fear-of-God.
Give her everything she deserves!
    Festoon her life with praises!

I love striving to be this kind of woman. Although making clothes is something I never quite got the hang of. Sorry, trying to be funny! I also feel like I am called to help other women find their way in life. What roles are you called to? Whatever they are you can know that God supports and loves you and wants to help you succeed in them.

We can be anything we strive to be. God calls us to many roles. The one He doesn't call us to be, is that of men bashers.  You never see any woman in the scriptures or in life, who has truly made a respectable mark for herself, belittle men. 

No we are equal with each other and should support each other in whatever role we women, and our men, are called to be. 

Blessings!

Love on the right side!

As I was sitting in the living room with my man last night it struck me how right things are for us. Rodney and I have a wonderful friendship where love, respect and an genuine caring about each other is a God given gift we share.

Now ladies  you might not agree with me, but I love being in the kind of relationship called for here in Ephesians....

Ephesians 5:21-28

The Message (MSG)

Relationships

²¹ Out of respect for Christ, be courteously reverent to one another.

^22-24 Wives, understand and support your husbands in ways that show your support for Christ. The husband provides leadership to his wife the way Christ does to his church, not by domineering but by cherishing. So just as the church submits to Christ as he exercises such leadership, wives should likewise submit to their husbands.

^25-28 Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church—a love marked by giving, not getting. Christ’s love makes the church whole. His words evoke her beauty. Everything he does and says is designed to bring the best out of her, dressing her in dazzling white silk, radiant with holiness. And that is how husbands ought to love their wives. They’re really doing themselves a favor—since they’re already “one” in marriage

I'm lucky because Rodney does love me like this. It makes living like this passage calls for, easy. Ladies it is freeing to be in this kind of relationship. Now I do have opinions and I do my own thing in the day to day of life. But I never pull away from Rodney and the things we have decided together.

Ladies our men can be very wise at times. God has given them a mind that sees things a little differently then we do. They can prioritize and separate feelings from decisions that need to be made, where as we mix things together and sometimes let our hearts rule, when it needs to be our heads.

 This is not always bad because sometimes our men need to be reminded of the soft side of life. God has given us the gift of discernment and our men need us to use that gift to help them when they are being too hard or even gullible.

See how this plan of God's comes together? He created us equal and He knew exactly how to make this husband and wife thing work. It is tough though when either one of us in our relationship forgets their role and wants to rule instead of love like Christ. And does not let God be in control of the marriage.

 I have to tell you that letting God be the leader in our relationship has gotten us through some pretty tough times. Such as a parting of ways with a business partner, which led to a tough financial situation. It would have been so easy at this time to blame one another and pull apart but instead we ended up stronger.

Another time was when Riley, our youngest was born premature and with Down syndrome.  We saw families in the NICU who had children in similar situations who's relationship couldn't take the pressure. Some babies were practically abandoned. My sweet husband was a rock and loved so deeply through the weeks of waiting. He got us through when others couldn't.

I'm not saying we never disagree but I am saying that with this kind of love we can make it through anything.

My hope for you ladies, is that you can be in this kind of relationship too. If not, find a way to help each other become all you two can be together. Prayer works! And if you can live for your man the way Ephesians 5: 22-24 says,  your example can show him how good life can be and will make him a better husband too!

Blessings!